Unwelcome Sound

I don't really have much to say, I just felt compelled to update.

B is now completely out of my life, I have absolutely no contact with her at all, number deleted, Face Book and Bebo deleted, MSN deleted, photos destroyed. It feels so good!

Things with L are going really well. People have commented on how relaxed we are around each other, and a lot of my friends and colleagues have noticed how happy I've been lately, and have asked about the change in my general aura (that doesn't make much sense, but I can't think of how to word it).

I get to see her usually two or three times a week, which I totally cannot afford in petrol, but I don't care. When I see her on a weeknight, I suffer enormously the next day at work, because I usually don't get home until three or four in the morning, sleep for about three hours, then go to work. But again, I don't mind. I live more than an hour's drive from her, and that drive on my own, in the middle of the night, is so horrible, just after leaving her and knowing I won't see her again for a while.

I've been accepted by all her friends, which feels so amazing. Last week, I went with her to band practice, and her friend A (who is twenty years older than us) made us dinner before, and was so welcoming, even though she had never met me before. I saw her again last night at this charity thing, and while we were outside for a smoke, A pulled me aside for a 'chat'. She was telling me that she is a good judge of character, and from the moment I walked in her house she could tell I was a very genuine, open, friendly person, and that she got really good vibes from me. She was also saying that she saw how I looked at L, and how I acted around her, and she could tell how much I really liked her, and how genuinely happy I was. She said that she's been through a lot in her life, and has seen a lot of relationships come and go, but that she had a feeling that what L and I have is proper, and for life. I couldn't stop smiling, just to have someone say so many positive things about me and my relationship with L, it meant a lot.

L makes me want to be a better person, she is so accepting of my past and my insecurities and issues now. She is so talented, and just, incredible. Words fail me. She just makes me feel so happy, and like I am actually worth something.