Too much.

So, a lot has happened.
Too much to detail here.

Positive:
When I was at my parents' house in April I told them about J, and after a shaky start (Mum said "I just think of her as your friend"), my parents are doing really well.  Much better than I'd ever hoped actually, because next month they are meeting J!

Not so positive:
Last week I received an email from my older brother (who hasn't known I'm gay for long. He waited about four days before sending the email) criticising and damning me for five pages.  It was horrific, truly truly horrific, and I was upset for a long time.  He quoted Bible verses (like I don't know what they say already?) and made it very clear that he would never support this 'life that I have chosen'.
He had actually sent a copy of the email to my dad, who showed it to my mum and older sister.  They actually all read it before I did, as I was away for the weekend with no Internet connection.  They talked about it, and decided that my dad needed to talk to him about it.  So Dad replied to him and told him it wasn't acceptable.  However, the damage was done, and I still feel sick when I think about it.
My brother has since emailed me to apologise for being so harsh... but has made it clear that his feelings remain unchanged.

Anyway, I'm trying to focus on the good things, and I'm very grateful for the members of my family who are being supportive and want to meet my girlfriend.  When I think back to all the drama of my previous relationships, what I have with J is so fantastically uncomplicated and real :)

Going home.

I head 'home' (Northern Ireland) next week for a week or two, and I am pretty nervous about this because it will be the first time I see my parents since I 'came out'.  I'm sure it will be okay, but I'm dreading the inevitable initial awkward "so... should we talk about this?"

They don't know about J yet, even though it's been over five months.  I will tell them when I'm home, I am sure of it...

Guess who is no longer in the closet....

... me!

The kind of girl she is.

I was having a horrible day, struggling with an essay big time

I opened my front door and found this propped up against the door frame...

 

J.

What can I say?
My life is rather different now than it was two months ago.

J and I are officially together now after a brief period of 'dating' and basically acting like a couple anyway.

I never saw it coming at all but I'm pretty glad it did :)

I just got home from a date.
With J.
!

My mad life.

I cancelled the date.
The girl (H) was too stifling; she was constantly texting and messaging online and I felt smothered after only a week of chatting.
There is so much more I could say about that; it was a pretty consuming thing for me... until tonight.

Tonight I was out with my university's LGBT society, when my friend J told me she was going to break up with her girlfriend.  She was visibly upset about it, and I was comforting her, when she went on to tell me that she really likes me.
WHAT!?

Anyone who has read this blog for even a small while will know how utterly uneventful my first year at uni was, now it's all go go go!
(At this point I should mention how I 'pulled' two different girls last Wednesday night... hey it was my birthday, so I'm allowed, right?)

Oh yeah, I'm now 23.  How terrifying...

This entry is all over the place, just like my mind.